GET TO KNOW : MOLLY HIGGINS

 In Get to Know

MEET MOLLY

Age – 23

Zodiac sign – Aries

Lives – Los Angeles, CA

Loves – Coffee, beer, laughter, beaches, mountains, books, crop tops, travelling, high-waisted pants

Hates – Injustice, racism, oppression, sexism, violence, racism, nail filing, grape soda

How’s your day been?

Good so far, pretty uneventful.

So what’s your day job?

I work as a receptionist and go to school full time.

What’s it like, being you?

Pretty weird. Complicated, fun, messy, silly. Full of both laughter and hardship. I’m constantly going and thinking about what’s next. I’d like to make my short time here in this body as fun and exciting as possible, because existing in a body constantly under scrutiny and oppression can be exhausting.

How do you feel about the way women are treated in media today?

Women and all other marginalized bodies–if represented at all–are completely misrepresented. I hate how women are portrayed so one-dimensional–you have to be the whore or the madonna. If you’re fat you have to be funny or motherly. If you’re disabled it has to be a major part (if not the only part) of your story and you must be inspiring. We as women are treated as sex objects, but vilified if we embrace our sexuality.

What’s been the hardest thing in your life?

I think most often our biggest struggles are the ones we put on ourselves. Yes, people judge me. Yes, people stare at me. Yes, people doubt my ability. But those people aren’t really stopping me from what I want. Anything I haven’t done was because of myself. My own fears and insecurities which have held me back from experiencing so much life. Which is why I want to fight back against those toxic thoughts and behaviors that tell me that I’m not good enough, not worthy enough, or that someone like me shouldn’t do what I want to do. For maybe the first time in my life, I’m starting to think that I deserve happiness and fulfillment too–even if the way I can work towards it looks a bit different.

What makes you happy?

A great cup of coffee; a hoppy beer; a good haircut; crooked smiles; crinkled eyes; a good fitting pair of jeans; people taking selfies; a lit fireplace.

What do you like about Instagram?

I love the fact that Instagram exposes you to so many different things, people, ideas, aesthetics, and concepts. It somehow both opens the world wider but shrinks it down so that everything is accessible to you. I SO wish that instagram would’ve been around when I was younger, I feel like it really would’ve changed the way I viewed the world and myself. I have been able to connect with so many other people with limb differences and different disabilities, people who are also struggling with self-image and recovering from eating disorders. It is so incredible to connect with so many other people who are going through the same thing that you are–you have a support system at your fingertips.

What don’t you like about Instagram?

Like everything, there are positives and negatives of it. For me personally, if I’m on it too long I start to compare myself to others. Who has more followers, and more likes, and better clothes, and better photography. Who has a cooler life and better experiences. Comparison is the thief of joy. That’s why we have to remember instagram is often highly curated and aestheticized–it’s the highlight reel of someone else’s life, and I’m trying to constantly check and keep myself accountable that I’m staying authentic.

How do you stay positive?

It can be really hard. I struggle daily with negative self image, erratic moods, and depression. I have to constantly make sure I’m not taking myself too seriously and remembering the fleeting nature of everything. I try to not get too worked up about inconsequential things, which can be difficult for me because I’m an extremely passionate and excitable person. It’s also really important for me to remember that I’m in control of my life. When things seem overwhelming or hopeless, it’s important for me to reflect on my choices and what makes me happy/unhappy, and try to work towards the life I want. Because life is so so short and it’s yours and yours alone, so you minus well make it a life that you want to live in.

What’s your perfect day?

My perfect day would probably be getting brunch and coffee with my friends, then just hanging out with my family, making food, drinking, eating together and playing games. I live pretty far away from my family and so having us all together is rare. But I love them more than anything and being with them is my happiest place.

Ten words that describe yourself?

Sincere. Caring. Genuine. Sensitive. Funny. Ridiculous. Wild. Adventurous. Loving. Empathetic.

What do you think about the word Dif-abled? do you think it would be a better word?

I have a lot of thoughts about disabled vs. differently abled. And the community is very divided about it. Some people like to use the word ‘disabled’ to describe themselves, re-appropriating it from the negative stigmatized, to give it new meaning. I personally don’t describe myself as ‘disabled’, I’ve never felt that way and I don’t identify as it. I also think by describing people as ‘disabled,’ it is ascribing the “normal” body as standard. There are an infinite number of different types of bodies, it feels too limiting to take a huge section and label it as ‘other’. By calling me disabled, you are taking the physically abled–often cis, white, and thin–body as “normal”–as “standard”. The ‘disabled’ body doesn’t exist outside of these parameters, rather we make up a rather large section. There is no “normal” or “standard” type of body.

What needs to change in the world?

So much. But really I think we need empathy more than anything. We need to look at people and be able to say: “you’re different than me. Maybe I don’t understand it or you, but I can see where you’re coming from and recognize your struggles”. The world gets smaller and becomes a kinder place when we can look out for one another and care for each other, even a little bit.

How could the fashion industry be better?

INCLUSION. INCLUSION. INCLUSION. We need more black and brown bodies. We need more Plus size bodies (and I mean every type of plus size–looking at you, the countless number of brands that don’t carry above a size 22). We need more disabled/differently abled bodies. We need more non-binary and transgender bodies.

What are you totally into?

Coffee and self-love.

Our next issue is about scents …. what you smelling right now?

Ooh exciting! My ultimate favorite scents are lavender, coffee, fresh basil, and fresh laundry.

How could you help your younger self?

I would tell her to not be so hard on yourself. You aren’t perfect and you never will be. Life is hard and it’s going to stay hard, but you have to have faith that all of the tough things that you’ve been through will be worth it. You can’t change how you look, no matter how hard you try. Start to look inward for your own beauty. And don’t be so devastated when your first boyfriend breaks up with you. He’ll drunkenly message you on facebook ten years later, you’ll get a good laugh and leave him on ‘read’.

Where do you want to be in 10 years?

TEN YEARS?? I don’t know! That seems like a lifetime from now!

I’m hoping to have done a lot of travelling and writing, and still be pursuing different modes of art and self-expression. I hope to have found someone I truly love and care about. I want to be at peace with my body and myself. I want to have eaten a lot of exceptional tacos and tried almost all of the mezcals that are around. I want to have found a jumpsuit that looks good on me. I want to be wearing bold lipsticks on the daily. I want to be fluent in spanish by then, have seen Radiohead live, and watched the northern lights.

If you had to make up an emoji for yourself what would it be?

Man that is a hard one! It would probably be a combination of the one that’s really excited wearing a cowboy hat combined with the girl that is shrugging.

What’s your nickname?

People love to shorten my name, so there are a lot of variations on that. But my entire family calls me bird.

Any question for HEY GIRL?

Whens your next issue coming out? Can’t wait! <3

DEC 2017 … ‘Scent and sight’ … we can it wait too Molly 🙂

BIG LOVE xx 

Follow Molly on insta @mollyahiggins

Photos by Molly and from her insta account!

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